Cultivating healthy relationships with those around us seems a little difficult, we deal with a wide variety of personalities every day. People also regret not being able to give their loved ones enough time and attention, which is a proof that relationships often matter the most in our lives. The process of defensiveness and criticism is common when something is viewed as criticism or assault, and is a negative pattern. When we continue to defend our position, we lose an opportunity to better consider the other person and his thoughts and feelings, and make the conversation much more explosive. Slowing down the interaction in a conversation that moves too fast means that everyone else needs to consider their point of view, diffuses the impulsive reactivity and helps you to respond in a rational way. When you appear interested and concerned about other people's opinions when accusing or questioning you, this helps to re-escalate the growing tension among you. Being empathetic helps a person to suspend his or her viewpoint for a while and put others in their shoes and consider their point of view and acknowledge any small aspect of how they see things that open up the possibility of a better relationship.
There are fundamental needs and expectations behind a person's suffering which have remained unmet. By tapping a person's hidden emotions to make them feel relieved, it can bypass anger and resentment that persists on the surface. Avoiding conflicts ends up having more of it, which over a period of time festers and expands and eventually explodes. Establishing a contact to ensure daily check-in to resolve current and ongoing problems makes a person comfortable when coping with disputes and disagreements. When conversing with others, silence is not desired, and people sometimes try to fill the void by stuttering words that don't even make sense.
